Monday, November 8, 2010

Autism: The Musical

I received a link today to this article about an 11-year old girl with autism that is part of the cast of a local production of "The Sound of Music".

This provided me with the perfect(ly flimsy) excuse to resurrect my autistic version of "My Favorite Things".  It also reminded me that I'd meant this song to be just the beginning of a full-scale autistic version of the entire musical.  Yeah, that never happened.  I only got as far as a few song titles:


  • "Mom Is Sixteen Going On Seventeen (Milligrams of Lexapro)" 
  • "Climb Every Molehill (Because I Don't Have the Motor Skills for a Mountain)"
  • "(Mom's Ears Are Bleeding From) The Sound of (Wiggles) Music"
  • "Audrey-weiss, Audrey-weiss, Every Morning You Greet Me (By Grinding Your Chin In My Ear)"
  • "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Candida?"

I got some fleshing out to do.  Anyhooz, here is "My Favorite Things" au-shizzle style.  I'd like to imagine the autistic girl in the article going rogue and singing these lyrics instead:

Numbers and letters and mall escalators
Pushing the buttons on the store's elevator
Fountains and sprinklers and toilets flushing
These are a few of my favorite things

Gluten-full food that I'm not s'posed to eat
Smells that are nasty like poop, pits, and feet
Toys that are beeping, flashing, or spinning
These are a few of my favorite things

When the light's bright
When my ears ring
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

Dora and Wiggles and Baby Einstein
Watching those shows til Mom loses her mind
Rocking and flapping and elbow pumping
These are a few of my favorite things

Bright shiny full moons and microwave ovens
Fridge doors and sewers and oak-tree-trunk-lovin'
Canadian geese and their stinky droppings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the light's bright
When my ears ring
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel soooooooo bad!

29 comments:

  1. Hahaha.... I love it! Can you harmonize?

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  2. I didn't know about the candida-autism connection.

    Perfect parody!

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  3. I know that girl in the article!! Mindi used to do ABA with her and my Dad works with her Dad. Isn't that awesome!?!

    Nice lyrics Lynn- those are a few of Audrey's favorite things!!

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  4. I hate the music from that show. Really hate it.

    Now I hate it just a little less.

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  5. You better copyright that, quick! Brilliant!

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  6. ::absolutely dying:: That was the funniest thing I've read all day. Are you sure that you're not a closet song writer?

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  7. Absolutely, positively awesome!!

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  8. I think a little tea just came out through my nose. Hi.Lar.Ious. My kid has most of the show memorized already. Give me a call and we'll take that shizzle on the road, yo.

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  9. One of my former spectrumish students wrote his/her own version of this song - not kidding at all. You just brought me back. (Even though I often say most students were my favorite, this one: soooo not my favorite.)

    Yours is hysterical.

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  10. Hilarious. This one will woosh across Facebook like whip lash. My possie will luv it

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  11. I never get sick of this version :)

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  12. This is the best thing I've read all week!

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  13. HILARIOUS!!! I can imagine you twirling and flitting around the house...singing these songs just like good ol' Julie Andrews would. :)

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  14. Thank you for this! That is my life wrapped up in a great old Sound of Music classic!!!!! I am new to this autism thing. and the blogging too. will you come and check me out when you have a moment...ha, ha, ha, ha.

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  15. OH MY GOD GET THE SONGS OUT OF MY HEAD.

    I hate you so much, Lynn....

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  16. I believe you have just summed up the entire spectrum in one song. The first stanza is basically my life. Passing this one along to my wife.

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  17. SO funny! We should have one of those screenings where you yell things at the screen and sing along, only we'll sing the autism version.

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  18. Oh, Weird Al, eat your heart out!

    Audrey-Weiss, Audrey-Weiss, every morning your greet me....twice. (or more)

    Your hysterical! :-D)

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  19. Love.Love.Love your renditon! I gotta say, thanks ... now I have the tune stuck in MY head :)

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  20. I hope all of you blog followers took the time to read the article, too; not that Lynn's lyrics aren't hysterical!

    I am so proud of Natalie (from the article). It is amazing to see the progress. I saw her in the musical and it brought tears to my eyes to see her participating. :)

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  21. If you sang this on YouTube it would totally go Viral. DO IT! DO IT!!

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  22. So happy that I could make that tune stick in everyone's head!

    @Mindi: It really is a great story! I fully expect @Lauren to work the same magic on Audrey so that she is on the dinner theater circuit by the time she's 11...she only has 5 years to make it happen!

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  23. OMG that's hysterical-- and I know those posts are not always as easy as they seem starting out. Like a jackass, I decided to tackle Gilbert & Sullivan one time (shameless plug: http://jerseydivamom.blogspot.com/2010/05/why-wouldnt-we-burst-into-song.html )

    Can't wait to hear the full production LOL

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