Friday, November 5, 2010

Pronoun Confusion Follies: Sing With You!

Another way in which Audrey is like a senior citizen:  she makes up song lyrics.  My mom is the master of this.  She's way beyond the usual "There's a Bathroom on the Right" stuff.  She doesn't even get close.  I'm old, so when I was growing up it was the heyday of the Eagles and for "One of These Nights" my mom would sing "Oooh, someone's in the kitchen..." 

Audrey takes after her Noni because she's been walking around here singing made-up lyrics nonstop.  I've been trying to catch her on video or at least voice memo but she stops every time I try.  So you'll just have to take my word for it.  In addition to the improv'd lyrics, Audrey's pronoun confusion makes things extree-oblique.  Here's her rendition of "You Are My Sunshine":

You are my sunshine
You are your sunshine
He is yellow
He is orange
You are a circle
It is so bri-ight
You are my
Suuuuu-un shi-ine
Right now

And then she ends with a little falsetto ching-a-ring, "to-day-EEEE".  Because every song, and almost all of Audrey's sentences end with "right now today". 

So I've made up some lyrics of my own, and I'd like to send out this rendition to all of my perennially pronoun-perplexed peeps:

I don't get pronouns
You can't get pronouns
I need me to help you
When you screw up
You'll never know dear
How hard they are for you
And by you
Of course
I mean me

Everybody now!


  1. "and by you, of course, I mean me. Right Now Today-eeee"

  2. Funny. Griffin does the same thing with the pronouns. Combine this with the fact that he refers to getting dressed as "putting a dress on" and you have recipe for hilarity. Just for fun, when I'm getting dressed in the morning (ok mid afternoon) my wife will ask Griffin where I am. His response will usually be, "He is getting her dress on."

  3. Bother - I've got that tune on the brain now. With those lyrics.

  4. My son recently had his speech evaluated at school, and afterwards he reported to me that "there was someone like at school today." How was she like your speech therapist, I asked. "Oh, you know...she did that HE/SHE stuff". Clearly in his mind there is a subgroup of adults who are obsessed with pronouns for no good reason. Heh.

  5. I now know I shouldn't read your posts at work OR in the car. Checked you out at a stop eyes filled with laughing tears!! I was a danger to my self and other motorists!

    You know, GA used to have the same trouble with pronouns. There is almost no evidence of her struggles with it anymore and I kind of miss it now.
    She did say "Oh Crap" for the first time yesterday. So, I got that going for me.

  6. Bwahahahahaha! It's going to be a hit with the kids... "tooooodaaaaayyyyy!"

  7. LOL!

    Okay, I'm totally confused now!

  8. Soooo funny! Caleb has just recently started singing and it's hilarrrrrious to hear the new lyrics. I love it. But my favorite is the added "brrrring-a-ding-dings" at the end of each verse. Definitely!

  9. I'm putting that on my iPod. or your iPod.
    my son does this all the time. Hims and hers are constantly reversed. I decided to view it as him not "seeing gender" which will make him a very enlightened partner to some lucky her/him someday :-)

  10. So Cute!! That is actually a beautiful message. I think she's telling you how wonderful you are.

  11. Hilarious!!!
    My daughter's senior citizen tendencies are more along the line of being completely off key all the time. I'm glad for your ears that your daughter can carry a tune, making one up is very impressive.

  12. Wow, she could be the new Weird Al Yankovic! Hey at least she's means she's happy!

  13. OMG...sorry to digress but did you NOT adore that book. That chapter on jesus, ?? "Him nice man. Him carry heavy wood on back.."

    Oh,my gosh..
    any friend of david's is a blesbian, er, friend of mine.


    TY for your kind comment at MomRenewal.


  14. @BigDaddy: I've told you a million times to stop with the dresses.

    @Aimee: Congratulations! Now you can finish that "Baby's First Swear Word" scrapbook page!

    @trydefyinggravity: I like the positive spin...I will be using that.

    @Empress: Lpve David Sedaris! This blog post would not have been complete without nicking his title.

    to everyone else: Thank me very much!!

  15. I bet she sounds great, even with the inventive lyrics. Mine sings everything on two notes.

  16. Found you threw Bad Words and your title totally caught my eye. My niece is 13 and is Autistic, and I taught children w/ special need for 4 years. So your title jumped out at me and made me giggle. Your post made me laugh. The posts about s*$#t my daughter says KILLED me. I just did a similar post on my blog, and my kids? Not half as good. Audrey is a gem. I think she is wise beyond her years and you'd better watch out!

  17. You need to try HARDER to get her singing on video ok??

    Owen screws up He and She all the time.. well.. he only uses She, don't really know why, he can't hear the 'S'.. anyhoo... this cracked me up good.

  18. You think I'll get the pronoun thing figured out some day.

  19. OOhhhh!(damn song stuck in my head) But I just figured it out! She is singing TO THE SUN! The sun IS HER SUNSHINE!
    I'm slow.
    Audrey is literally awesome.... And awesomely literal.

  20. Audrey can come babysit my boys. For a while, we could only get them to wash their hands after toileting by singing the wash-your-hands song (to the tune of "Shake you booty"):

    Wash wash wash
    Wash wash wash
    Wash your haa-aands
    Wash your haa-aands

  21. Thanks a million for visiting my site and following me!! I was beyond excited to see you there this morning. I also grabbed your button :)

  22. Oh, I laughed SO hard at this ... the one upside to being comatose/puking for the past three days is that I have so many of your awesome posts to catch up on :-)