Saturday, February 19, 2011

Every Moment a Stressable Moment

One week from tomorrow, Audrey and I will be jetting off to the happiest place on earth.  So naturally I'm stressed out of my mind.  Happiness.  Hmph.

We are headed down to Disney World with Audrey's BFF Grace Anne and her mom Aimee.  We'll be going to the Magic Kingdom, and maybe Sea World or Epcot, as well as meeting up with the Big Daddy clan.

I haven't traveled with Audrey since we moved back to Chicago in 2007, and in  this post from last summer I explained the fear and dread that came along with me even thinking about taking a vacation with her.  All of which still apply.

Only I could get stressed about having to try to relax and enjoy myself.  Here is a just a sampling of the free-floating anxiety batting around my head:

  • How in the hell am I going to pack all of her supplements for the 4 days and nights that we will be there?  There are gozillions...some of which need to be refrigerated and others that are just disgustingly vile.  If cod liver oil leaks out onto our clothes will it wash out or would I have to burn and bury them?

  • How many pages long would a social story have to be to get Audrey through this trip?  I wouldn't know because I haven't even started on one yet.  *hyperventilating*

  • I've got to remember where I stashed all of our summer clothes and hope that there are some that have not been outgrown.  By me, that is.

  • What if Big Daddy and I have nothing to talk about?  "Hi."  "Hi."  "This is weird."  "Yeah."  "OK, so..."  "Yeah?"  "Yeah."  "I like your blog."  "Cool."

  • Does it count as weight-loss if I shave off a couple of pounds of leg hair and dry heel skin before I go?

  • Toon Town just closed for a 2-year renovation project the week before our trip.  Just my freaking luck!  Never mind that Audrey has never been before so won't know what she's missing out's still qualifies as a curve ball, people!

  • "I should really think about getting a new swimsuit.  Let me just get online here for a second and check some out.  Or maybe I should try to save money and try on some of my old ones.  Ack!"  When did I turn into a fucking Cathy cartoon?

  • How many fully-charged electronics will I have to carry on to cover the length of the flight?  And will I have to pack a separate suitcase to fit all of the chargers that I will have to bring to recharge them for the return flight?

  • Which is worse:  the cankle-icious look of giant white athletic shoes paired with capri pants or risking ringworm and traction, but looking more fashionable, in flip-flops?

That was all just as I was brushing my teeth this morning.  And then while I was flossing...


  1. Kudos to you for embarking on such an adventure! I'm a wimp when it comes to travel with Dan.
    I wish you a Wonderful Time, as stress free as humanly possible. ;)

  2. This is going to be the best trip ever

  3. Everything will turn out great and you're going to have a fabulous time! And if you don't have anything to talk to BD about you can punch him in the arm for whatever he'd about to say about your cankles. : )
    Have a great time!

  4. Okay for a minute I thought you were traveling to Southern California and I was about to start stressing out about how I could get on a plane to come meet you. Alas.

    You know the anxiety is almost always worse than the thing itself. I'm sure BD is never at a loss for words.

    And get a ziploc bag for that cod liver oil.

  5. Amen to the Ziploc bag. Also, amen to hitting Big D if you don't have anything to talk about, he's probably got it coming anyway! :-)

    Oh, and also? Amen to "this is going to be the best trip ever!"

  6. Have none of you seen Ordinary People?!?!? Best Christmas ever?!?!?! Best anything ever = guaranteed tragedy.

  7. Oh, to be a fly on the wall for the BD meeting!

    If you guys run out of things to say, he can always take you out for a McCherry pie or a smoothie. Or you could sit side by side and just tweet each other, lol!

  8. haha, kelly i think you are on to something- they should definitely have a twitter party while they are together- i'd tune in ;)

    i wish you the best of luck lyn- i'm getting ready to fly to texas again with brian in a couple of weeks and am stressing as well- but our trip will be much quicker and less stimulating than yours

  9. possible conversation starters in case you find you and BD really have nothing to talk about...

    Do those tights come in any other colors?

    have you always preferred lycra?

    Where do you find stilettos in that size?

  10. Have you asked your daughter's doctor to write a letter about how Audrey would have outbursts while waiting in long lines?

    Take that letter to Guest Services (or whatever it was called) - you will get a special card that lets you go into the handicapped line, and not have to wait more than a few minutes for rides and attractions.

    I did that when I took my son in 2007 - it helped immensely - not one meltdown for our five days there.

  11. Whatever happens, trust me, it will not be as bad as our disney trip last year. Trust me.

  12. "When did I turn into a fucking Cathy cartoon?" you are completely awesome. and i, too, am anxiety girl, i so understand that list of concerns you made.

  13. Your blog ate my comment again. No big deal. Just 10 more things for you to be anxious about that took me an hour to write. Ugh.

  14. I would have all sorts of cuticle devouring anxiety over shit like this.

    Except the swimsuit. 'Cause I totally rock the one piece with full skirt to the knees look. Is wicked hawt ya know....

  15. it will be awesome

    I will do my post on Disney world - so you have some tips to read in a few days- as we did it for the Dec vacations

    It was soooo great

    Where are you staying ?

  16. Girlie, you do sound stressed! I am sure everything will be fine. Or at worst, less than fine, but fun just the same. Hope the BD thing goes well.

    What is a social story?

  17. Dude, where'd you get that picture of me?
    And who wrote out the transcript of our meeting last summer?

    Lots of ziplock baggies for the supplements- especially the oils! Bring a little cool pack on the plane for refrigerated supplements. I'm a freaking pro, by the way. The bird has about 87000 miles on Delta. She should be upgrading me.

  18. My small, but nevertheless great piece of advice...don't wear the flip flops. You'll want comfortable walking shoes. Fashion goes out the window at the happiest place on earth.

  19. I'm sure you and Big Daddy will get along like an old married couple!

    Who knows, maybe the trip will be fantastic! I hope it is, and you have a great time!

  20. Speaking as someone who has panic attacks at the thought of getting BB to the end of our road, I'm very impressed at your bravery.
    And look on the bright side: if it's a disaster you'll have LOTS to blog about when you get back. Because this IS all about us, your readers, isn't it?

  21. I am exactly the same as you I stress over any trip and hate packing and panic the whole time I am gone about things I may have forgotten....and that's before I even think about any autism issues!
    We took Mikey and his brothers to Disneyland Paris last year for his birthday (so we did not have to do party stress!) and he absolutely loved it! I was advised by several people before we went that we HAD to book one of the character meals for his birthday. Well I looked at it (and the price!) (and the fact he wouldn't eat anything on the menu!) and wasn't sure. When we got there I was glad I hadn't bothered as he liked looking at the characters from a distance but got quite hysterical if one came near him or we tried to get him to have a photo with one. He coped quite well with the queues but the fast pass tickets are great and getting there early in the morning works too!
    I'm sure you will have a great time!

  22. You know what is the OTHER happiest place on earth? Valium. Take one.

    Love Anxiety girl cartoon!

    @Big Daddy: are you sure it is *the Blog* that is eating all the comments?

  23. For some reason fun events always turn me into a wreck. My husband tells me to just chill out...but I can't. The weirdest things go through my head...

  24. The supplements and my son's food is the THE main reason I crumble at the idea of a "vacation". Fish oil is the most vile stuff ever. Ruined my favorite t-shirt when my son spit it out on me. it was even in juice. the little chewable flavored things are what he takes now. and he chews them so the strawberry flavored oil bursts in his mouth. ick!
    have fun! I'm sure it will be despite your need for a rx for xanax.

  25. "That was all just as I was brushing my teeth this morning. And then while I was flossing..."

    Whether you are a really quick thinker or merely a compulsive flosser, Disney will probably hurt less than you think. Because you will have so many opportunities to see totally non-autistic kids throw tantrums in front of exhausted,sweaty and embarrassed parents, it will make you feel awesome !
    Have fun ! Any good Disney apps ?


  26. Oh and I was also going to add that anxiety is my splinter skill, seriously, it's what I'm best at- so if you need more reasons for being anxious, just ask- cause there are some you kind of left out :).


  27. @ThisSideOfTypical: Love you! Bout time someone was on my side.

    @June: Why are on it!

    @Jen: Now that I know what happened, it had better not be.

    @K: We're staying at a Wyndham resort in Reunion....?

    @Bella: A social story is something that we write for our kids, basically telling them the story of what they can expect in various situations. It helps them to process it and set their expectations so there are less surprises.

    @DeeAnn: I will be taking your advice.

    @Louise: Thanks for the great advice. We will not be doing one of those character meals for the very reasons you state. And yes, fast pass all the way!

    @BigDaddy @Aimee: Total user error.

    @Lillian: I think I'm good on my own, but so kind of you to offer! And yes, I tantruming typical children!!!

  28. @Lillian: that was supposed to be I <3 tantruming typical children!

  29. Everything is going to be fine! It's the happiest place on Earth right? I really want you to post some of your Disney social stories.. "I am so happy to see Minnie Mouse, but I don't berate her or scold her. I don't tell her that she can't have a cupcake or that she's a bad girl."

  30. You could not pay me enough money to go by myself to Disney so I commend you and you have achieved superhero status in my book! If you are like me, you worry about the worst of everything, so when things go better you are delightfully surprised. I think you need a social story library for this trip - the airplane, the hotel, each theme park, what to do when you meet a character (and not to get arrested for harrassment of a mouse), meeting BD.

  31. Love the Anxiety Girl cartoon! I totally get the anxiety thing...and am with Tulpen, I'd have ripped off my cuticles.

  32. We're heading to Disney a few days after you. While I have no advice on packing supplements, I will tell you to not worry how you look. I'm a frequent Disney visitor and I can guarantee that no matter what your choice in footwear, you'll look like fucking Miss American compared to most of your fellow Disney visitors. There are some seriously fugly people and some questionable fashion decisions at that place.