Tuesday, March 15, 2011

I Hate Bliss

Audrey caught me off guard a few weeks back when I heard her use the word "hate" for the first time.

"I hate bliss", she said.

Wow.  I have really screwed this kid up.  Has she picked up on the fact that I am completely unable to experience happiness of any kind in even seemingly the best of times?

Turns out that she was talking about the inferiority of the Bliss brand of Hershey's chocolate as compared to Dove.  So go on ahead and ignore all of that other stuff up there in the previous paragraph.

I should have known better than to think that she was talking passionately about anything other than sweets.  But it did really throw me to hear that word coming out of her mouth.  So I started taking stock of how often and under what circumstances I use the word.

Shockingly, I use it a lot.  And in regards to really stupid bullshit.  Here's a sampling of stuff that followed the words "I hate..."
  • Wal-Mart
  • Fruity teas
  • The keyboard on this computer
  • Daylight Savings Time
  • St. Patrick's Day
  • This intersection.  (Why the hell is there no turn on red?)
  • Red cabbage
  • Jay Leno
  • These jeans
  • Notre Dame
  • Our newspaper delivery "boy".  (Who happens to be a 50 year old woman who never gets here before 9:00am.)
  • Black appliances
What the fuck is wrong with me?  Where is my perspective?  Is it really necessary to use such a strong word for such trivialities?

So then I tried to scrub the word out of my vocabulary and found myself saying "can't stand" instead, which I'm not sure is much better.  Anyway, I think that might just be missing the larger point of why I let stupid little things get to me so much.

I should try to think of this as a teachable moment, an opportunity to really own my spirit and speak my truth.

Except I really hate that shit.


  1. LMAO - I like Jay Leno. But I hate a lot of other shit too but hell what the hell right?

  2. **lol** My son's recently started repeating speech more than ever (he's talking so much more these days **yay**) and the other night I think he overheard me arguing with his dad cause I may have called the Hubs an asshole and as I stormed out of the kitchen I *may* have overheard my son say "ah-hole" as he was playing with his toys. I really need to start watching my language even if I think I'm out of earshot.

    I hate that shit.

  3. Totally with you on the Wally World rage. I staged a one woman boycott, but, the effects have neither been felt nor appreciated by the corporate tools. Fuck Wal-Mart.

  4. I think daylight savings is totally worth hating. My 4yo has started using the word too, but totally inappropriately. For example, he'll say "I hate Spongebob," and then ask to watch it.

  5. It turns out that I call things stupid a lot. Often times sarcastically, which I'm sure my kids totally get. *eyeroll* I probably say I hate things too.

    Way to point out the error of my ways and make speech so much less fun.

  6. Walmart sucks! But what you said about Notre Dame, that's just blasphemy.

    We haven't heard the "hate" word yet, but we get lots of "you're mean" and "you don't care about me." I hate that shit.

  7. Hate is a totally appropriate word for the emotions brought out by crappy chocolate. You should be damn proud she chose the right word. In fact she could stand to pump that up a notch. You should teach her despise.

    Bliss? Blach!

  8. We've banned the words 'hate' and 'idiot' as they were popping up way too much and I hate it! It's just not the same around here....AND we had a major setback when the science channel started to advertise for an idiot abroad in the middle of how its made--god did my kid fruit out when he saw that.

  9. Jay Leno hates you too.

    Btw, Audrey is, as usual, right about the Bliss / Dove thing.

  10. Me too. My kids call it the "H" word and call me out. Nothing better than a 6yo yelling "I strongly dislike bananas!" at the store.

    My husband pointed out, so graciously (not), that I exclaim frequently "Lookit!" instead of look at it. Now I know I sound stupid. Uh, I sound no so smart.

  11. LOL! I used to say, "You are plucking my last nerve." But then it was parroted back to me. At church. Only it wasn't 'plucking.' Yeah me!

  12. ^^^^^LOL @ Kim!!

    It's very difficult for me to admit I hate chocolate in any form, but I hate Bliss, too.

    And I also hate St. Patrick's Day. No one should limit their consumption of Irish Car Bombs to one day a year.

  13. dont worry my TWO year old son recently said "i HATe this rain in my life". whoops.

    and I really hate Wal-Mart too. ewww.

  14. LOL! First, Audrey is right, Bliss sucks compared to Dove. I'm impressed with how refined Audrey's chocolate taste buds are at such a young age.

    Second, I hate Jay Leno also. I really don't think that's trivial!

  15. I don't say I hate Wal-mart. My saying is Wal-mart sucks. Same thing. Just what is an Irish Car Bomb?

  16. I try not to say it, but let's be real, our society as a whole uses hate very liberally. If she didn't hear it from you, she could have heard it from any number of TV shows, the radio, a book, or even on the street.
    And Walmart really is worthy of hatred. Their aisles are WAY too skinny and their merchandise (can I even call it that?) is always miserably disorganized.
    Georgia usually preempts me now when I get upset and says, "Dis Absowutewy Ridicuwous, right Mama?" Cute at home but not so cute when you're waiting on that slow checkout lady with a long line.

  17. At least you don't use the F word. I might let that slip now and again (or 17 times a day).

  18. She obviously has discerning taste. Anyone with highly developed taste buds can tell you that Bliss is the equivalent of pig poop. ANd at least she didn't bust out with "Bliss fuckin' sucks ass."(which is what my kid prolly would say) Then you might have a problem--even if she is absolutely correct.

  19. 1. Why St Patty's Day? What did it ever do to you?

    2. I honestly don't care what I say around my kids. I have too much other crap to worry about. There is no changing of vocabulary over here. But that does explain why Jaylen has the foul mouth of a sailor. Parent fail.

  20. Have her taste a Lindt Chocolate Truffle. She'll hate Dove as well.

    Amazing what they pick up when you don't think they're listening. They're little parrots.

    I like what This side of Typical said...."Bliss fuckin' sucks ass" is probably what I would have said.

  21. ...but your attitude is what makes you so damn funny! (and why those of us who are afraid to say such things love your blog ;).

    Truth be told, overly happy people DO get on my nerves.

    I've never been a fan of St. Paddy's Day either.(shh....don't tell Jen!)

  22. Lol!

    There's a real North-Side Dublin (Think The Commitments) saying... "I hate tha'"
    Which morphed into the phrase..

    "I don't mind kissing, but I hate tha'"!!

    Hope you enjoyed your holiday.

    xx Jazzy

  23. This made me smile which is something I really needed today. Thank you.

  24. I'm not trying to inflate my comment count. I have to do them one at a time because I'm working on an old computer that just ate a humongous comment.

    I'm so impressed with this group and the amount of hating on Bliss chocolate. Really? Get some perspective people!!!##@$Q@

  25. @Marsupial Mama: Watching your language sucks balls.

  26. @Amanda: I do that same thing with The Bachelor.

  27. @Stimey: Audrey's BFF who we just vacationed with thinks of "stupid" as a swear word. She'd be all "HEY!!!" whenever I said it. Turns out that I say stupid a-fucking-LOT.

  28. @AmyLK: I thought that Irish car bombs were explosives put into English automobiles. But I'm beginning to have a sneaking suspicion that it may be an alcoholic beverage. Me smart.

  29. OK, this computer is bumming me out so I'll just say

    @Colleen: Awww...you are so welcome. Hope your day is looking up!

  30. What?! You hate ND? I'm a fan of their football team. That's OK as long as you are not a fan of either USC or Ohio State, which I imagine you aren't. Feel free to hate those teams too... but I do understand why people who are not fans really dislike the Notre Dame.

  31. Hating Notre Dame is a good thing. Every week on NBC? Please.

    Saying can't stand could incite a literal frenzy about Wal-mart falling down.

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  33. HAHAHAHA! I so relate to your message here. I use that word waaaaaay too much too.

    However, there is a case to be made for using "hate" more often. In linguistics class in college, we learned how over-use of a word could rob it of its meaning. So theoretically, if we use "hate" all the time, it will cease to mean anything!

    Have I told you how much I HATED linguistics?

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  35. Hate is not too strong a word for Wal-Mart. I HATE Wal-Mart. That said, I do use hate too much for trivial things. At the same time, I think I use love too much as well. I love my family, I love my friends, I love peanut butter cups. Should peanut butter cups really rank on the same level as my mom?

  36. I called out my older kiddo the other morning for using the word "hate" twice about two different fairly trivial things in the space of about 20 seconds. One of them was "that SpongeBob episode," I forget the other.

    When I asked her if she really needed to use such a strong word, she thought a second, and then amended her word choice to "don't like."

    Hate it when that happens. (Heh).

  37. Femmeburger - you're channelling Anne of Green Gables! (Actually it made me think of a quote from Anne of the Island, which I've just been reading aloud to my Rose):

    "You LOVE it," said Miss Patty with emphasis. "Does that mean that you really LOVE it? Or that you merely like the looks of it? The girls nowadays indulge in such exaggerated statements that one never can tell what they DO mean. It wasn't so in my young days. THEN a girl did not say she LOVED turnips, in just the same tone as she might have said she loved her mother or her Savior."

  38. @Femmeburger brings up an excellent point. Are we talking about the King Size Peanut Butter Eggs or just the normal PB cups? that might make a difference in how I respond.

    @JoyMama: Miss Patty should see things now. How many things are truly "awesome" or "amazing"? How is it that every day is the worst day of my life?

  39. Your lovely girl is correct in her chocolate critique..the dove promises are rather nice even if they have ridiculous quotes on the wrapper..which I loathe along with Walmart, and Leno, and way too many other things..sigh...

  40. I think I have the same jeans. I am so guilty of this too. I have to be way more careful. They pick up everything so quickly. Stumbled this.