Thursday, May 5, 2011

Memories of Merona

Audrey has very strong clothing-based memory.  Is that even a thing?  Whenever I put something on her, it's "I hit my teacher in this dress" or "I threw the ball at Mary in this shirt" or "Last time I had this shirt, Aidan hit Grace Anne".

As they can be, most of her memories are violence-based.

She also comments frequently on things that I am wearing.  But here's the thing:  I have very few clothes.  Actually, I should rephrase that:  I have very few clothes that I wear.  I have a closet full of clothes that either don't fit me anymore or I hate or don't fit me anymore.

I can't spare the money to buy clothes for every fat phase, and of course I keep thinking that I'll lose weight and then miraculously have this whole new section of my closet available to me.  Except those clothes are mostly from the late-90's.  Mama is not giving up until she can fit into that Spice Girls t-shirt again.

My winter attire consists of exactly 2 pairs of jeans and about 5 tops.  For summer, I have two pairs of shorts and maybe...hmmmm...I haven't seen my summer attire in a while, so I'm just gonna spitball and say...about 5 tops.  On second thought, I may actually be down to one pair of shorts this year because after we got back from Florida my mother-in-law was here and dried one of them all the way through.

Audrey is still growing out of her clothes fairly quickly, so we mostly just get one season of her back-stories-on-repeat until the stuff gets donated or handed-down.  Although we did give a bunch of stuff to Lauren's niece Emily, including the dress that Audrey famously hit her teacher in.  So that little misty-beat-down-memory may still have some life in it if she sees Emily wearing it.  Yeah, that would make for some awesome party conversation.

On the other hand, Audrey has seen me in any given outfit every 5th day for years.  So when I wear a certain shirt, I get "Mom took me to school in that shirt" and "Mom was at my party in that shirt" and "Mom wore those pants at the mall" and like 500 other things because I freaking always have the same things on.  It's like she gets on an infinite loop and can't stop herself because the memories are endless.  She eventually stops when smoke starts coming out of her ears or I whack her upside the head.

My clothes are so old - HOW? OLD? ARE? THEY? - my clothes are so old that my kid's memories of them include "Mom was in California in that shirt a long time ago" and "Mom had a baby in her tummy in those pants".  Not even kidding.  I don't know which is worse:  that my kid's memories of my clothes pre-date her existence (she's seen the pregnancy photos) or that I'm still wearing maternity sweats.

34 comments:

  1. I have clothes that I still wear (they are extremely snug or were very loose on me to begin with) that are from HIGH SCHOOL. Bras, panties especially because they have some sort of super stretch. High school....mid nineties.

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  2. Other than bras and panties, I still wear the same clothes I wore in high shcool. Since I'm only 19, I don't think that they're too dated yet. Go class of 2009!!

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  3. I fit in almost nothing from my pre-Ash days...except some shirts I still have...that were giant, shapeless t-shirts in elementary school... Since they never WERE becoming they are allowed to continue to be unbecoming, and have stuck around simply because I didn't have to buy them, they were still miraculously intact, and it's always useful to have some "don't care what they look like" clothes around, right? Except since I fit in almost nothing from pre-Ash, haven't had the money to buy much in the way of new clothes SINCE-Ash, and rarely get out of the house where anyone who cares what I look like, might be looking.......well, Ash sees me in them a lot. While he remembers everything, he thankfully hasn't started making a point of it yet, in this case...

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  4. lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I wear my clothes OUT. Till they have holes in them.. and only then, they usually become a pajama shirt lol I recently dropped a ton of weight (training for the teenage years) and I, like you, have 5 shirts, and 2 pairs of jeans. I went and got 3 pairs of capri's for sprint. Shorts? I have some from about.. 10 or so years ago.. Similar to the picture you have posted here. Mom-shorts. High waisted..hahaa I went to Kohls with Tommy the other day and wandered over to the "fat lady section" (yeah we're not sensitive here lol) and couldn't figure out why 1X was too big. I don't know how to shop at the normal section. It's been 15 years! hahahaa I might just end up cutting off my yoga pants lol

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  5. I so relate to Audrey's object-based memories. Everything I own has these kinds of memories attached. I can vividly remember where I got them, who I was with, what the light was like, how I felt, etc. etc. etc.

    When the memories are good, it's a great gift. It brings back the past as though it were yesterday. When the memories are painful...not so much.

    I've found that the only cure is to a) put things away for safekeeping where I can't see them (always risky, because of the Pandora's box effect when I go rummaging for something and forget they're there) or b) give them away. I'm getting really, really good at giving things away. :-)

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  6. You are so funny. I do often wonder why my kids get really expensive shoes that don't even last a whole year while I am trying to use black marker to cover the scuffs on my dress shoes :)

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  7. Clothing based memories!! That rocks! I only have your run of the mill olfactory memory. I can smell a man's perfume and remember every man I ever ahemed that wore that smell. That totally made me sound like a slut didn't it. There hasn't been THAT many. It gets awkward when my husband gets a new cologne and I blurt out "Wow, you totally smell like my boyfriend when I was 25".

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  8. No worries - they're not old. They're vintage. I'm finding it really depressing that while wearing my 10-year-old pants, my stomach is a better looking butt than my butt is.

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  9. Awesome. My son sings "Go Cubs Go" every time I wear a Cubs shirt, "Bear Down Chicago Bears" for the Bears, and daughter says "Go Bulls." Wait, this isn't practical or related. But you might like it.

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  10. I had a friend in highschool that associated clothing with every memory. "When I was a toddler I fell down the stairs. I was wearing a yellow top with a red flower on it and jeans that felt too tight. My mom was wearing a blue jumper with a stained white t-shirt, my sister...." I kid you not that was how she commented on anything that happened longer than a month or so ago. I thought it was kind of neat that she could remember stuff like that but yeah as a fellow mom of few clothes.... O_o

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  11. First of all, Audrey is awesome to be so chatty about clothing! Apparently, what's needed in more clothes in mom's wardrobe so she can increase her vocabulary and language skills, right? ;) And Mother's Day is right around the corner, right? I see a bit of a hint going on in this post...

    I have two pairs of jeans that are year round - forget shorts and about 5 tops that make the rotation as well, soul sister. What about the shoes? I gave up ever wearing a pair of heels when my guy was born so sad! Can't run or carry in those...

    And you - having fat clothes?! Puleeze! Impossible!

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  12. For mother's day this year, treat yourself to some new clothes! Live it up!

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  13. I'm the same way, thankfully my son doesn't seem to notice. He does haven an unusually good memory, though. (ie. "I bought this candle at...")

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  14. Ha!! That's brilliant!! I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that! My main wardrobe is prepregnancy stuff I can't get up past my knees (it's all boxed up for safe keeping since we have a tiny house) and then I have 1st half maternity clothes (I got so fat I had to wear bigger clothes halfway through my pregnancies) which I'm currently wearing. My 2nd half maternity clothes is also boxed up so I'm prepared for both eventualities: losing weight and (far more likely) gaining it.

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  15. Love the "mom jeans" picture. Man I miss maternity sweatpants.

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  16. I still have those early 90's leggins that I wear to sleep but whatyaknow they've come around again so I should totally wear them out in public now, under a mini skirt or something like the girls do. Or maybe I could just donate them to Big Daddy.

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  17. Our son doesn't comment so much on our clothes but he did recently go through a phase where he had to pick out the long sleeve t-shirt he wanted to sleep in every night. If it wasn't clean he would go searching for it just to make sure!
    As for me, I get attached to t-shirts and wear them out so much that my wife just eventually gets rid of them when I'm not around so I have to get more...I have to be comfortable around the house to chase these 2 boys around!

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  18. This is too funny. Why are our kids always way better dressed than we are? Seriously, we do all the hard work. But I'm like you, I have my few comfortable outfits that I don't deviate from. I can only hope that when the kid is grown and out of the house I'll be buying a nice old lady wardrobe.

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  19. @Rebecca: You went to high school in the mid-90's? Man, I'm old.

    @BD: Ew. Isn't that always my response to your comments? Just ew.

    @Rhiannon: I've got the old t-shirts too...they used to be just for cleaning gutters, but now they are my fancy wear.

    @Rhonda: How could you have lost weight and not known it? I wanna be on that diet!

    @Rachel: So fascinating. Audrey also does a lot of noticing things around people's heads like earrings, hair accessories, hair-do's, etc, but can't tell you what color anyone's eyes are. It's like everything but the face is imprinted in her memory.

    @LLAPrincess @Flannery: I should have taken a picture of how Audrey looked dressed for school today. So effing cute. I spose I should put a small fraction of the time that I shop for her into shopping for myself.

    @Noonie: You slut!

    @Kara: That is an awesome line. Next time my husband criticizes my butt I will refer him to my gut.

    @Brian: What no Blackhawks?

    @OneRichMother: That friend sounds a little spectrummy...?

    @Karen @Cheryl: Yeah, I will have to treat myself for Mother's Day cuz there won't be a lot of gift-giving going on around here. Maybe I should but out those xmas gift certificates and hit the mall...

    @AMR: Yeah, if you keep something long enough it comes back around right?

    @Lou: I think all wives have that "get rid of something when you throw it in the wash" move!

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  20. 2 pairs of jeans and 5 tops...that's what everybody wears right?
    Let's just think of it as being "eco-friendly"

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  21. There's a restaurant I haven't been able to visit since my daughter was two. Every time we drive by she points and shouts: "There's the place where you had a fly in your soup!" That child's long memory is going to be the end of me.

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  22. First things first: HAHA. See, I can say that, because my son hasn't conversed enough to embarrass me yet.

    I never buy clothes, either, but my mother-in-law frequents garage sales, and about half of the clothes she buys actually work out pretty well. I still end up wearing the same shirts over and over again...who has time to look for freakin' laundry, anyway?

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  23. My kids don't comment on what I wear at all. I got lucky that way....now nakedness, that's a whole other story.

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  24. Wow! GA does not have those skills. She is extremely, um, creative, when it comes to picking out clothes though. I thought I had it made since both girls are wearing the same sizes which would double both wardrobes. But noooooooo. GA says "I can not wear this. It is too Charlotte-ish."

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  25. @Lynn: I have trouble looking at faces, too. Way too much information comes from a face -- especially the eyes. Oh, my God in heaven, it's absolutely overwhelming. But I will notice very small details about attire, because attire doesn't resonate with emotion and soul the way that a face does.

    Once I get to know a person and feel comfortable, I don't have a problem looking at the person's face, but it takes me a while to get to that level of comfort, and some people just put out too much jangle for me to ever feel comfortable with it. It will be interesting to see how Audrey moves along that trajectory.

    I was recently watching a film clip about Carly Fleishmann, a severely autistic, nonverbal teenager who has begun expressing herself in writing and says some pretty amazing things about her level of perception. She says that she has to look away from people's faces because when she looks at a face, she takes 1000 pictures of it at a glance and it's more than she can take in. I thought I was pretty sensitive to this stuff, but 1000 frames at a glance -- wow. That's a level of perception I can't imagine.

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  26. I am also wardrobe challenged. I have lots of clothes but for the same reasons were a very limited repetoire of things. Glad to know I'm not the only one. We should start a club. =)

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  27. **That was supposed to say "wear"....not were....I'm so lame. Sigh.

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  28. This is, BY FAR, my favorite post of yours. Funny. Funny. Funny!

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  29. Oh I know...I too have a full closet...but not the energy to even try-they are clothes from another life. 90's clothes though..in about 10 more years they will be back in style..It would be so much easier if there were uniforms-don't you think? A one piece thingie that would expand or shrink to fit your personal needs..crap I've given this too much thought...

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  30. Thank God Audrey was never in my class. My teaching wardrobe was limited to like three pairs of pants and about 8 shirts because that was all the (cheap) clothing I was sacrificing to fingerpaints, markers, runny noses, vomit, and other disasters of a early childhood sped classroom.

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  31. I love Audrey's take on the world. She would have a field day in my classroom with my wardrobe/uniform.

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  32. I have clothing-based memories as well! When I saw my doctor yesterday, the first thing I wanted to say was, "Oh hey! That's that outfit you wore when you had a meeting in the afternoon and I had to come in at 10 o'clock instead of 4 o'clock!" But I didn't, because that might have been weird...but I wanted to :)

    I also remember certain articles of clothing from years ago, like which shirt I was wearing when my mother yelled at me in the front seat of the car on my way to school in 4th grade, and which shirt I wore for the picture that accompanied the "when I grow up..." essay in 5th grade (I didn't know there would be pictures that day! eek!), and which shirt and pants I wore to the park that one day in 8th grade...

    It's quite nice to know I'm not the only one :)

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