Monday, June 27, 2011

Taylor Swift and Russian Sailors: Just Another Typical Special Recital

Audrey had a piano recital last weekend.  It was the same drill as the one last fallread social story, perform, earn pink cupcake.

She's now done four of these: two as part of a special needs variety show, and two hanging with the nippicals.  In all cases, I spent every minute on the verge of Oprah's patented "ugly cry".

The first recital that she participated in featured a teenage girl with Down Syndrome singing "Some Day My Prince Will Come" and a song called "Reflection" which included the lyrics:

Look at me / I will never pass for a perfect bride
Or a perfect daughter / Can it be?
I'm not meant to play this part
Now I see / That if I were truly to be myself
It would break my family's heart
When will my reflection show / Who I am inside?

What, were they trying to kill us with that?  I'm on a daily ration of horse tranquilizers that are supposed to guarantee that I am unable to manufacture tears, but that performance was like anti-depressant kryptonite.

At this latest recital, one of the prepubescent girls sang a Taylor Swift song about a guy that is with the wrong girl and she goes and busts up his wedding...not sure which song it was cuz I think all her songs are about that.

Not at all fighting the urge to
pull her dress over her head.

Anyway, she was cute as a button and I could just picture her singing the song into her hairbrush in the privacy of her normie-girl bedroom with posters on her walls of Fabian or Tyrone Power or whoever the kids are into these days.  And that made me choke up too, but for entirely different reasons.

The typical girls were unusually endearing all around.  Audrey had to sit in a row with all of the other kids in the order that they were performing.  She was seated between two girls that looked to be a year or two older than her.  I was seated directly behind so as to keep tabs on her.

The girls saw me lean over and tell Audrey to put her legs down and stop hiking her skirt up and flashing the people on stage.  After I did that more than a couple of times, they took over and helped tug her skirt down whenever it started to head north.

It was such a small thing, but I kind of loved them for it.  I wanted to stuff them both into a sack and make them accompany Audrey to school until she graduated high school.

Audrey performed a song called "The Russian Sailor Dance".  Because everyone knows that Russian sailors are known for their dancing...


  1. What are you talking about?!?! I love Russian Sailor dancing! It's a great workout. I have their DVD's ... hahaaa

    She was fantastic!

  2. Wow, that was amazing. My kid would do anything for a pink cupcake too. But then, so would I...except diet.

  3. BRAVO Audrey!!!

    PS The horse tranquilizers never work with performing children...

  4. The Reflection song is from the movie Mulan, one Disney girl/princess who didn't make the cut (and probably my favorite).

    And I'm not sure I behaved any differently than Audrey in all my piano recitals...and I never got a cupcake.

  5. The reflection song was just a low blow. So totally not fair to the parents (or the kid singing it). I think EVERYONE should have gotten pink cupcakes for that one!

    Great performance, Audrey -- BTW. I can't wait for the encore!

  6. @JFC: No wonder I didn't recognize the song...I don't know any of the Disney princesses unless they wear a ballgown.

  7. Too adorable! What a great performance :)

  8. "Girl beat down cage fight"!?!? Thanks, youtube!!! And, yeah, that song is a Disney princess song...haha. Even *I* knew that, and Mulan is like the boring princess Katie doesn't care about ; )

  9. the little girl sang Someday My Prince Will Come, then a song about her not being a bride and being made to play this part, etc, etc? I mean...what? I am a blubbering mess most of the time, and have yet to find a horse tranquilizer that works for me, which is unfortunate. Audrey did great playing her song. K's teacher doesn't seem to do recitals, which I am kinda glad for.

  10. Gawd, Lynn, I need to get me some horse tranquilizers. *sniff sniff* Ones that really work. Audrey did great, and so did those nippicals who helped with her skirt. That kind of crap gets me every time.

  11. I would have to boycott recitals for fear of drowning the crowd. Can you start casting your vote for some Pat Benetar or Joan Jett songs? Of course, I'm sure those would somehow leave me as a puddle of goo as well.

  12. She really did well! I teach piano lessons part time, so I watched the video a couple of times. Seriously, I'm impressed. And I have a typical student who has feet that smell like rotten eggs and likes to scratch her armpits during lessons- don't stress too much about the dress fidgeting.

  13. Thanks all!

    @BWMFA: You can't tell so much from the video but she was pointed in the completely wrong direction and was bowing to like potted plants or something.

    @Jen: I hadn't thought about the contradictions in those two songs. Man, I got played.

    @k: I agree...I'd still be crying no matter what the typical kids sang just from thinking that it's something that Audrey might not be able to do *sniff* *sob* She'll NEVER be into Joan Jett...waaaaaaaa!

    @Christy: That DOES make me feel better. Audrey did well, but of course she's played it better a million other times. She stopped in the middle as if she was done and missed the dramatic final chord. Lesson: Next time make like Tiger Mom, call her "garbage" and chain her to the piano.

  14. @Christy, my "normal" son has started sticking his hands down the back of his pants and smelling them. Seriously? Is anyone really a normie? lol

  15. You should see somebody about those urges to stuff NT kids in sacks.

    Btw, her bow at the end was much better this time!

  16. We haven't been brave enough to have our son perform in a recital. Good for you, and Audrey!

  17. Audrey gave that sailor dance PIZZAZ! Thanks for inviting us!!

  18. Fab experience...altho it's the girls helping Audrey at the end that would have had me blubbing XXX

  19. She was fantastic!!! You should be a proud Mama, worth a pink cupcake or two:)

  20. She is so incredibly beautiful. And talented. She is an amazing kid. I love that she bowed to the pot plants. They are the ones that count after all.

  21. I love that Audrey played that song her way, with a brief intermission and a bow to the inspiring potted plants at the end (it would have been different were they pot plants!). The nippicals helping her with her skirt were awesome and I hope they came at least close to the cuteness and personality of Audrey's performance! But seriously, dancing Russian sailors? Were Armenian tight rope walkers taken?

  22. Some normie kids can be kinda cool!

  23. Regarding the girls who helped keep the skirt down, I had a similar experience with some older boys on my son's swim team. Short story: Some boys 2 age-groups older than my son needed a 4th kid for a relay in the city-wide swim meet. My son was so slow he wasn't even competing in the relay in his own age group, much less 'aging up'. They explained that all he needed to do was not get disqualified, because even if they finished last, they would still earn points for the team.

    I was (of course) terrified that he would be ridiculed and the center of attention in a very large indoor swim complex. He said he would do it to help them out. He swam the last leg of the relay. By the time he made it to one end of the pool, the other teams were already done. When he turned to go back, he was the only one still swimming. Swimmers for the other teams kind of wandering off out of boredom, but those teenaged boys stood there and cheered him on.

    On that day, I was so proud of him and was actually encouraged that not all teens are jerks. Still makes me a bit misty-eyed.

  24. @BD: I know right? Whether I love them or hate them, I'm always stuffing them into sacks!

    @Noonie: It was a piano recital not a Moby Grape concert!

    @Alisha: LOVE that story. Love typical kids that are not jerks.

  25. Read this morning on my phone so commenting now. Audrey had the rhythm and the piece developed into chords - and the pause in the middle? Hey - that was for the drama!! I like her style.

    What strikes me about it was how she placed her hands back in her lap! I remember being coached on that and the "curtsy" for the end. (Don't you think she just wanted to avoid too many people by facing the other way for the bow? - completely understandable and great coping too...)

    Where was that recital? The piano sounds so good and it looks quite lovely! Awesomeness mama! Truly. LOVE!

  26. I remember my first piano recital (I was 4). My teacher had a sudden death in the family, and the funeral was on recital day. So I had some stranger sitting at the bench with me to do a duet, instead of the teacher I adored. I was distraught, and almost refused to perform.

    Good times, good times.

  27. I'm pretty sure I learned that song when I took piano lessons.

    As always, your girl is super sweet. Sorry I haven't been around lately. Happy Summer!